Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Missing my family for the nth time...

I took a couple of blottles of beer last night just to make me sleep. Like most of my scheduled departure for Malaysia, I had a hard time sleeping the night before. So I took my usual medication for sleep deprivation, San Mig Light! hahaha!!!

The alarm went on at around 4:45am and I had this feeling of not going to stand up from bed. I just hugged my son while feeding him. I look at my 9-month old daugther while she was sound asleep. She seem very peaceful sleeping and that seem to start a very good day for me.

My wife, Ella, was still either half awake or half sleeping. I made a little embrace to before setting off for a bath...

Well, I guess that started my day today. Early morning wake-up call for the usual travel to Malaysia... feeling saddened by the fact that I'll be leaving again my family and be alone again for the next week or two. But on the other hand, I feel good knowing that I am doing this for them, for my family's future.

I am missing Josh's songs, cries, and his wits. I am missing Lela's kisses. I am missing Ella's company and her mumbles and her laughter. I am missing their love. I am missing the joy of being with them..

As I take the ride going to Clark, then goes the feeling of emptiness setting in. Maybe, I was enjoying more and more the company of my kids each day or I am missing the milestones that my kids have while I am away, or I will be missing the company of my wife for the next few days... these thoughts make me feel depressed and tired...

I just arrived here in Malacca. Tomorrow will be a new day and the next days and I look forward for coming back home again in a week of two...

Oh God I missed them...

3 comments:

ivanhenares said...

Just dropping by and checking out the Pinoy blogosphere! :)

http://ivanhenares.blogspot.com

dimaks said...

Well, there are times that we ought to leave, no matter what. But the most important thing is that you and your family are together in thoughts and heart though you are miles away by physical distance.

Hopping by from Japan.

callingthephilippines said...

Its really hard to leave our family but sometimes we have to just to give them a goo, better life.. its really hard but what is nice is that we realize how important they are..