The Longest Six

Who would have thought that six hours would be that long? It was bladder blasting. It was the longest prayer time of some worried souls inside the family waiting room... It was simply agonizing.

Five patients at the operating room at one time, five worrisome families waiting for some news, silent, crying. One could hear the chaos at EDSA from nearly a mile away. The silence is just deafening. Phones vibrate. Friends and families' SMSs waiting for some news too... a welcome relief sometimes of the tensions building inside ones chest.

Ella and myself left home at 3:55 in the morning for an hour's trip to the Philippine Heart Center. We just want to be at the hospital suite before Mang Boy is taken to the operating room. Funny though, the first time I saw Ella so much religious and prayerful the past few weeks. She downloaded a rosary prayer app from the appstore and started praying with it while we were on the road. I'm no catholic but I understand. One should be in reconciliation with the Creator especially in times like these. One must have the bestest, most sincere prayer for some time and it was very beautiful.

Mang boy was already prepared for the operation when we arrived. He was already connected to two IV lines. The medication nurse was explaining to him about all those meds and pain relievers and sedatives that were to be administered to him and all. Mang boy looked tired. He didn't sleep that night, felt some butterflies in his tummy and told me he was really scared while he was being stretchered down to the OR. Mang Boy is one tough guy but it surely looked like he felt helpless yesterday. One damn helpless person indeed. I would strike a joke. He would strike back one. Just like the day before yeah. He would speak english to me full of "you knows..." The nurses would laugh at him especially when he joked about mama being fat... I signed some papers and let him go, really hoping and praying for the best. It was 7:00 AM. As I went out of the OR receiving room, I saw a little girl waiting for her turn to be received. Chills you know... What have she done to deserve an operation like that... chest to be opened, heart to be repaired and all. Later I found out that the girl's pacemaker had to be replaced after nine years. 

Soon other patients came in... some even babies. It was an aweful feeling really. Why the babies?

At the waiting room, I saw Ella and my mother-in-law reading their novenas. The other lady praying the rosary. A couple of guys who came in earlier were reading newspapers and a couple in front of us holding each other's hands... I guess they were comforting each other in silence. The room was so damn cold. Perhaps helping the mind to concentrate on the praying...

Came the news. Ella was called to the surgery waiting room and was told that Mang Boy's surgery was a success. Four and a half hours on the table, an hour and a half more than the scheduled three hours. Ella was told that they found scars around his heart, signs that he had multiple silent heart attacks before. The aorta is safe... for now. One tough heart in one tough guy. It was around 12:30. Ella's bladder was already filled but she didn't want to let it drained.

Mang Boy was out fo the OR at around 1:00 in the afternoon. It was a very relieving feeling. We made it to 50% of the process. He had to recover and must be awake by 6:00 in the evening. One surgery down, one more to go within the next seven days.

Ours is a good news... The other family was not a good one. We prayed for the best. They prayed too. Just sad that some soul's hopes are to be shattered in vain. Imagine the wait. Imagine the time spent. Imagine every single pain inside. Imagine everything. It could have been ours. The disappointment could have been to somebody elses... God must have some reasons. We wouldn't know. But I'm sure God is a comforting God. I'm sure. Life has to move on. Life has to go on. 

There are a lot of realizations these past few weeks. Spiritually uplifting, eye-opening experience. And truly during these stressful and agonizing days, we meet some new acquantances that cheer us up, new friends, we know more of the friendships we have made, some are real friends and some are just not good enough.

"When things are bad, we take comfort in the thought that they could always get worse. And when they are, we find hope in the thought that things are so bad they have to get better." 

– Malcolm S Forbes

Daybreak at Caleruega

trail leading to Caleruega

The plan was to have breakfast in Tagaytay after we were invited by Ella's aunt for a breakfast at Josephine's Restaurant last Sunday, 11February. The thing was, the restaurant opens at around 8am as we were told and we woke up at around 445am so I decided to go to Caleruega first. So we left our place at around 530am and it was still dark.

The morning scenery of the countryside was so amazing and it was jaw dropping... So here are the pictures that we took on that beautiful morning.

Ella, Josh and Shai posing like mad in this area. We took about 6 pictures just in this location. It's really a very welcoming sight. This is right before the trail descends to Caleruega.

Josh and Shai on the steps leading to the church.

Caleruega church at the background. This church is famous for weddings and retreats. The scenery is just great yet very refreshing to the mind...

Me, Josh, and Shai...

At the church's entrance. Sadly, there was a retreat that day that we were hesitant to take photos inside.



Ella, Josh and Shai on top on one of the retreat cottages at the side of the hill...

Madonna and Child statue at the side of the hill where the church is situated. Josh was just so amazed with these religious icons. He was screaming mad just to go near the statue...

Interested in going to Caleruega? Here's how:

Via South Luzon Expressway, take Sta. Rosa exit and proceed towards Tagaytay Market. Turn Right to Rotonda and proceed to Nasugbu, Batangas. Turn left at the Evercrest Hotel and Restaurant. It is about 500meters from the Nasugbu Arch. The road ends at Caleruega. Really, it's worth the trip!

For couples who may want to consider a great venue for their wedding and for retreat enquiries, you may cantact Caleruega-Philippines at +63921-2709890 or +63921-8304226. Ask for Ms. Jackie, Ms. Imelda or Ms. Cristalle.

Just a wishlist

New year. This is the time when I got to believe that I am growing old, of course next to my birthday. Goodness, my birthday is fast approaching!

Well, I just got here some of my wishlist for this year. Some maybe an attemp to reach beyond the moon, but I'll give it a try though...

1. A three-column template for my blogger blog. This one is already granted just this afternoon. Thanks hackosphere for the easy to understand turorial!

2. A car! This time my wife and I realized that we need to have one. Jeez! For a year we haven't thought about this one. Damn!

3. A concept a small-scale business. I was trying to fish out for a good start since November but I am still not sure of what product do I want to promote. This one is still an important goal for me. I am trying to dig into franchising business and hopefully I could be able to land one.

4. My own URL. Like www.jaylagat.com or www.langyawnijay.com or www.kathangisipnijay.com or whatever. Crossing my fingers!

5. A travel to Boracay or Panglao with Ella on our anniversary. This one is my two-year old wish. Grrrrrrr.... But I am not wishing for a third child. hehehe!

6. My own personal computer. Learn to develop webpages and flash. or a playstation 3 or wii. hayyyyy....

7. My kids be of good health the whole year! I wish that Josh's ability to learn will be more and more faster so that he will be going to school next year!

8. Better relationship with Ella.

9. Makeover Ella's office on a Saturday before I leave for Malaysia this month. lol! This one is a junkie! hahaha! Well, we have some frames here ready for an office makeover.

10. Though the Philippine economy is getting better (NEDA says), I wish that Filipinos will be able to feel it. Kahit konti lang po.

11. I wish that the current leadership will no longer sell filipino souls to the americans.

12. I wish Richard Gomez will not run for the Senate and I also wish that Garci will not win in the congressional elections.

13. I wish that the injustice secretary will lose his voice so that we will never hear his noise again. Kahit sobrang malat lang sa buong taon, matutupad na wish ko na to.

14. I wish that GMA and most of the politicians will join a reality TV show. Yung concept na tipong titira sya sa squatters area or sa ilalim ng tulay or pwede rin sa may malapit sa dumpsite.

15. Mayor Nila Aguilio will realize that the Pulo-Diezmo road in Cabuyao, Laguna is almost not usable for vehicles. Oh, where is the road tax going? Hello? Are you there, Mayor?

16. Daniel Smith will go back to the Makati City Jail the least... Sa Bilibid kaya?

Well, these are my top16. Nine of these I considered attainable. The others, I don't know.

Happy New year everyone!

Bracelet

I met her when Ella and I were still dating about five years back. She was an adorable person. She was my friend. She was Ella's grandma.

I would always hear her usual greeting "Hi, Jay!" whenever she sees me especially when I pick Ella at mid-morning for a date. In a way, I have always enjoyed in the company of grandmas and that makes me feel normal all the time. I just like to talk to them and listen to their life stories and laugh. Feel like I'm still a kid listening to Lola Basyang's stories in the afternoon.

One time, I made her a bracelet out of swarovski (not sure of the spelling) jewels that Ella and I bought at Divisoria. I asked her not to lose it. The days following, I would always see her wearing it especially when she goes to church. I knew she cherished the simple gift that I gave her... and that alone makes me feel so good. Seldom that I see people cherish the simple tokens that I share... and I found it in lola Jovita.

Months ago, my mother-in-law told me that lola lost the bracelet when she alighted from the jeep in Bicol. I was told that she was saddened and kept on asking her son to find it because it was from me...

All the while I thought of giving her one... I never had the chance.

She left for Bicol about four years ago and I never saw her until three weeks ago in her hospital bed. She was in pain. She can't move her left arm. She can barely open her eyes. But she tried to be responsive whenever someone pays a visit. It was so heart wrenching. And I saw Ella for the first time so hurt and broken that she cried and cried.

She never saw me since and the feeling of guilt pains me in a way that I didn't take the opportunity to see her when she was still awake. I only thought of wanting to take rest after a long day trip. I should have paid her a visit. I would have been at peace.

She never saw me since. I never heard her usual greeting to me again.

Yesterday at 4am, Lola Jovita left.

She was 85.

Salamat lola. Paalam.

Great day for World Boxing!

I was excited today. Woke up at 7am, had a hot shower and took off to 7-eleven to buy a loaf of classic gardenia.

Ella called me just want to ask when the boxing starts… like all other pinoys out there, she’s excited. I just can’t imagine how peaceful the Philippines is right now. I hope nobody dies of heart attack today when Pacquiao fights. Lol!

Viloria technically lost the fight although it was a majority draw. He fought quite well as far as I am concerned. He just lacks the follow-ups especially when he downed Nino on the 9th. I don’t call 5th a knockdown. The last round was supposedly his last chance but he didn’t do it well. But he fought better than the last time they met last August and faster, too.

But that is boxing. Somebody has to lose. Unfortunately, it has to be Viloria and Erik.

Manny is just too good for Erik today. I feel sad in a way because I am fan of Erik as well. He was a great fighter and it saddened me that he has to go this way. I thought he doesn’t have to end his boxing carrier like that. He’s this guy who outboxes all his opponents and now he was downed 3 times.

“I think it's time to go home now and forget all this…” Erik Morales

PacMan is just too good of a boxer today! Not only that, Manny has just lifted our spirits today and nobody can take that away from a nation looking for a lift right now. I never saw PacMan fight that fast before, even in their second meeting last January or even with Barrera about 3 years ago.
Kudos to PacMan. All the best! Mabuhay ka, Manny… You gave us a hell of three rounds! Thanks man!

Who’s next? Hmmmm… Barrera, Marquez… line ‘em up!

Thank you Astro for the opportunity to watch PacMan boxed El Terrible live… I just hope that someday Dream TV will wake up and make some noise in the Philippines like you do here in Malaysia.

But wait!!! I just can’t believe Chavit Singson was there inside the ring, waving his hands with the mighty PacMan like he just won the presidency. Shit! That sucks!!!

A hesitant heart

Wednesday, about 2 weeks ago, Ella confided with me about her conversation with her boss that day. It was about her being appointed as an OIC Chief of one of the divisions of the agency. In one way, she was quite hesitant to accept the offer because of the fact that there are other seniors at her level who could definitely do the job and that definitely she'll probably be able to demoralize some of her colleagues (the seniority thing which is now a mere backward thinking for me...).

Second, she was hesitant because she is too young to accept the offer. Then, she thinks she is not yet ready to do the job and that other seniors can do better. But on the other hand, she was glad that day knowing that her boss has the trust on her all the while.

"That's the point!"

Anyway, I told her that these days, though still considered, seniority is no longer at the top of the list of corporate mindset in terms of human resource and she and all her other collegues should understand that. Then most of the time, the boss sees more of her than herself and that may be one of the reasons why she picked her despite having other seniors to look into. And of course, she can't question her boss' decision in one way or the other. She can ask all the 'whys' and 'what ifs' but if she's rejecting the offer, it may be sending a wrong signal to her superiors; that she is weak! And only a few people have that opportunity and she should be lucky to be one of the few...

I suggested to accept the offer. Though it is not promotion, it is an opportunity for her to do more and better out of her job. "Don't mind the rumors! It is normal in corporate environment. It will subside in a few weeks. Just do what you are suppose to do!" I insisted. Afterall, it is for her to prove the rumors wrong.

The papers were signed last Wednesday. There were well wishers, there were sourgrapers. Some minds congratulated her, some minds were not so welcoming. Some are happy for her, others could be mad. Some smiled, some frowned.

I told her... "Hon, it is not your fault, could be theirs... congrats!"

Then the hesitant smiles...

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Want to know Pareng Edwin's text today? click here...

Medical malpractice, can you believe that???

"Wrong blood type kills woman, baby."

"Wrong injection kills 3-year old girl..."

Medical macpractice in hospitals... wtf!

I heard the good secretary of health this morning in a morning show saying "the baby is already in a severe condition, with sepsis..." What??? Wow, I just can't believe he said that kind of excuse! The fact of the matter is, the hospital staff used the wrong injection to the poor girl at hindi pinag-uusapan dito kung gaano kalala ang kondisyon ng pasyente.

The same with Ms. Victoria who was supposed to give birth died because of a wrong blood type given to her during the transfusion. Imagine, type B blood was used instead of type A??? She and the baby died!!!!

It is understandable that definitely these incidents were uncalled of. Nobody in the medical profession wants this to happen. However, these incidents should have been avoided if these guys are too careful in carrying out what they are supposed to do. Pucha, hindi kagaya ng mekaniko ang pagkadoktor o pagka nurse na pwedeng palitan ng hex screw ang phillips screw!!! Buhay ang nakataya dito. They have no choice but to be careful in what they are supposed to do.

Come on, Doc. Secretary, please don't say that excuse naman. Please...

Calling on the Philippine legislators... yung Patient's Rights Bill po baka pwedeng basahin na jan sa congreso at ipasa na. Wag na po natin hintayin na ang isang kamag-anak ng congressman o senador na makaranas ng ganito, at magmamadali nang ipasa ang bill para makabawi sa nagkamali. Ganyan naman dito sa Pinas, di ba? Kung hindi maapektuhan ang mambabatas, ok lang.

One example, Dr. Loi Ejercito authored a bill in the senate to release more funds for dengue researh after one of her grandchildren (or great grandchildren) was infected with the terrible desease. I'm not bluffing, this was in the news about 2-3 months ago...

Classic example, Sen. Revilla (Sr) filed a bill to revise the family code so that the illigitimate children can use the father's surname... I just can't remember what incident triggered him that time but it was in the news about 6 years ago... to protect his other children...

Nakupo, yung nursing exam contreversy pala... what more can I say??? Well, the review centers are now monitored... duh!

2006 budget for health pala ay 0.25 cents per filipino according dun sa dokyu ng Probe ata yun o yung sa i-witness early this year. Biogesic costs 5.00 pesos a piece. Could you belive that???

I'm not saying that because of all this medical malpractice issues, we don't want to trust the doctors of these hospitals. In fact, in engineering terms, it's only a 'spike' in the data and is negligible. But medical profession can't simply accept spikes as part of their profession. Spikes like this can lead to death!!!

No excuse or whatever!

When I grow up, I want to be a...

"Class, I want you to write a formal theme with the subject 'What I want to be when I grow up'..." Si Mrs. Chavez, grade 3 adviser namin.

Naalala ko lang nung una kaming pinagawa ng formal theme sa grade school. Si Shaira kasi, pinsan ni ella, nagpatulong sa kin gumawa ng isang story summary tungkol kay Ramon at Jose. yun nga lang, parang kwentong bisaya naman daw yung summary na ginawa namin sabi ni ella. Eh ano ba naman expectation nya e bisaya ako!!!

Naalala ko nun, tuwing mga ganitong gawain sa eskwela, ang nanay ko ang aking karamay... maraming beses sya ang gumagawa at maraming bese din akong may 'very good' na marka at may pirma ng maga adviser namin. Naman! Nanay ko ang gumawa e... hahahaha!!!

Di ko din masyado maakukuha kung bakit 'My ambition' ang pinaka common na subject pag formal theme writing. Mula nung grade 3 hanggang nung sa grade 6 ako e yun at yun ang pinagtrtripan na subject ng maga guro namin. Bakit nga ba? Di ko natanong kay Ms. Zamayla (grade 6 adviser namin) kung bakit. Siguro di pa ako maruning magtanong nun...

So ito yung mga naging ambisyon ko nun mula nung natuto ako sumulat ng formal theme:

Grade3 - "My ambition in life.... My ambition is to become a teacher someday..." Oo, gustong gusto kong maging maestro nun. Gusto ko lang siguro maging katulad ni mama na magaling magturo. Frustrated, tinuruan na ako ni mama matutong magbasa at sumulat nung apat na taon pa ata ako nun... Kung sablay, lagapak abutin ko.

Grade4- "I want to be a Doctor someday... I want to help the sick..." Pucha, sabi kasi ni papa na gusto nya akong maging doktor kaya inisip ko na yun bago magpasukan sa grade4. Pero nung sumabi baba ko sa barbed wire, ayoko na... Hindi ata humanga sa akin si Mrs. Pongo nun kasi 85 lang nakuha kong marka.

Grade5- "I want to be an Engineer someday... I want to build buildings and bridges..." Gaya ni Mrs. Pongo, hindi din ata humanga sa akin si Mrs. Nunag nun at 86 lang marka ko.

Grade6- Eto yung pinaka memorable ko sa lahat ng formal themes. Pucha, 90 nakuha kong marka nun. "My ambition in life is to become a ood father, a good husband, and a better person..." Siguro nung time na yun e nagsawa na akong mag-sip ng kung anu-anong ambisyon at maliit lang naman pala nakukuha kong marka... Big time ako nun, pinabasa pa ako ni Mrs. Zamayla sa harap ng mga kaklase ko at yun daw ang pinakamagandang formal theme na nabasa nya. Mula din nun, naging magkaibigan kami ni Mrs. Zamayla hanggang nung nasa trade school na ako. Hanep! Sa totoo lang naman kasi, naging inspirasyon ko nun si papa na walang trabaho at si mama na nagkakayud para lang kami mabuhay...

Wala na ata ako ambisyon nung unang dalawang tatlong taon sa high school nun o baka hindi lang napag-usapan sa formal theme ang 'I want to be someday' na tema nun. Pero ang pinaka ultimate ko na ambisyon at yun talaga nakatatak sa utak ko sa loob ng apat na taon ay ang pagpapari. Syet! Gustong gusto ko talaga maging pari nun. Pumasa pa ako sa isang semenaryo sa may Cainta nun, Barnabites ata ang seminaryong yun... pero di na ako tumuloy. Nahihiya ako sa mga magulang ko at umaasa sila sa kin na kahit papano ay makatulong naman sa kanila kahit pa nag-aaral ako... Ayun, di ako naging pari. Buti na lang!!! Pucha!

Pero kahit hindi ako naging doktor, o titser, o engineer, o pari... kahit papano naging asawa at naging ama naman ako. At kahit papano, isa sa mga naisusulat ko sa mga formal themes na yun ay nagkatotoo naman... Di ko pa nga lang sigurado kung talaga bang mabuting asawa ako kay Ella o mabuting ama sa mga anak ko, but I'm trying to be one.

Isang masungit. Isang mapagmahal...

"Hello?" Pupungas-pungas pa akong sumagot sa telepono ko mga hating gabi na yun nung sang buwan... Pabalik ako nun sa Pinas kinabukasan at kailangan ko gumising ng alas tres ng madaling araw at may dalawang oras pa ang byahe papuntang airport.

"Hon, san ka? Bat tagal mo sumagot, aber?" Tanong sa kabilang linya...

"Huh?" Ang himbing na ng tulog ko tapos ginising pa ako.."Dito sa kwarto ko natutulog... ano ba naman yan, hon... kailangan ko magising ng maaga..."

Tiningnan ko relo ko at 12:24 na ng hating gabi. Dalawang oras na pala akong nakatulog...

"Weh, asan tv mo? Buksan mo kung anjan ka talaga." Sabi sa kabilang linya na may tamang duda... Nananaginip ba sya na may kasama akong napakagandang chick at kailangan nyang magising ng hating gabi at tawagan ako? May nakain ba yang kakaiba bago matulog at ako ang pinagdediskitahan nung magising sya sumakit ang tyan nya? May nagmumulto ba sa bahay?

Tumayo ako sa pagkahiga ko, dumeretso sa sala at binuksan ang tv...

"Ayan, masaya ka na?" Balik ko sa kanya...

"Weh, baka sa ibang kwarto yan... Ano yang naririning kong babae sa background?" Nang-iinis...

"Kulit mo! Reporter ng CNN yang naririning mo!" Pucha, wala na akong paglalagyan neto... "Bahala ka nga!"

"Hon, sige na... ingat ka bukas ha. ab yu!" Ayun! tapos sabay baba ang telepono nya.

"Hello! Hello!" Wala na ako narinig pa...

Si Ella, misis ko. Buwan buwan ko nararanasan yan. Kung hindi nya gagawin yan, ako mismo tatawag sa kanya bago ako matulog at iparinig sa kanya ang tv ko... at iparamdam sa kanya na naninibago ako... hehehe!

Oo, Nakakabwisit. Inaamin ko din na pikon talaga ako. Alam mo yung mukhang naghahamon palagi ng away na wala namang kadahidahilan... Pag pinatulan ko, tapos na araw ko. Kung hindi ko naman papatulan, tapos na rin araw ko. Wala talaga akong choice kundi patulan ang pang-iinis nya. Sa huli, kahit papaano may napaguusapan din naman kami.

Ganyan lang naman si Ella. Unti unti ko na syang naintindahan. Sa isang banda, naiisip ko nag-aadjust pa lang kami bilang mag-asawa. Tatlong taon pa lang din naman kaming magkasama... Talagang ganyan...

Pero hindi mapapantayan ng pangungulit nya ang pagiging ina nya sa mga anak namin. Hindi din mapapantayan ng pangungulit nya ang saya ko tuwing makikita ko siyang masaya. Hindi mapapantayan ng kakakulitan nya ang tuwa ni Josh tuwing dadating sya sa bahay galing sa trabaho at kung pano ipinapakita ni Josh ang pagmamahal nya sa nanay nya gabi-gabi. Hindi mahihigitan ng mga pangaasar nya sa kin ang pagmamahal na ibinibigay nya sa akin, sa amin.

Happy birthday, hon. Salamat sa pagmamahal... Salamat sa suporta...

Ab yu...

Deepavali Saturday

I had a chance to celebrate Deepavali in Malaysia last Saturday with my Indian friends. What made me interested most is the way most Malaysians celebrate such festivals. They try to make it simple and just try to enjoy the day.

My chinese colleagues picked me up at my hostel at around 3:15 in the afternoon (i thought I'd be having a bad day, they were supposed to pick me up at 11am) then we went straight to Seellan's place. I thought, like us Filipinos, they'd be having lots of foods, alcohol and all that... so I prepared myself for that day. But..

Seellan offered us some Indian biscuits and beer. Then he prepared us a good 'calderetang kambing', which tasted so good... chicken curry and java rice. That's it and I actually ate with my hands... hahaha!

With Seellan and my chinese friends

I didn't asked but Seellan explained that it's the way they celebrate. They are just happy having their friends come over to their place and mingle. So when Hariraya is celebrated by the Malay muslims, they will also go their muslim friends' house and mingle (even if they are not invited)... and so with the chinese new year and christmas... 'most important is that you have friends...' he told me.

Cool...

At 8pm, I went to another indian's place and celebrate with his family. I was just the only one he expected that night though. Dr. Panchal is a pure Indian by the way. We had some veggie foods and some just been sent by her mom from India, a pepsi gold and some fancy fireworks outside their flat...

Dr. Panchal with his wife and daughter

It was a good day. A good Deepavali Saturday.

Damn small step...

Like everything else, it all started with a small step... and I did.

It was exactly a year ago when I decided to step up and prove to myself that I can still renew the confidence that I lost since I left the first sales company that trained me to be a salesman. Not only the confidence that I wanted to renew, I also wanted to claim the person that I was before. The feeling of being a looser started to overwhelm me and I was afraid that it was going to be out of control. I knew it would be a mess.

The president called me the day my 8-month old son was operated. I can still remember what he told me that time and it was really confusing...

"Jay, pasensyahan tayo. Nawalan ako ng mga kaibigan dahil sa 'yo. Ang ganda ng pasok mo sa kompanya ko... hanggang next month ka na lang. Gusto ko bumenta ka. Wala akong pakialam kung ano mga pinangako sa yo ng mga naghire sa yo..."

Looking back, I remember one May morning that a former colleague called me for breakfast. He said he wanted to talk to me about the future of my son and my family... His words struck me. He was my friend, a family friend....

Then he talked about how good his company was performing a year before. He talked about how much they enjoyed their Christmas. He talked about the future of the company. Their plans. The expansion and all sorts...

"Pare, gusto kita makasama dito. Para to sa inaanak ko. Sa tingin ko walang mangyayari sa yo jan... yung kinikita mo ba ngayon kasya sa mga gastusin ng pamilya mo? Tingnan mo ko pare..."

"We lack supervisor. I want you to be my supervisor. You will handle about a couple of sales persons and all you have to do is supervise. You don't need to sell... just supervise..."

I thought about it. The compensation was good. It was more than good for my family to survive for a month. Car. Perks. Guaranteed year-end bonus. Etc...

Honestly, it all boiled down to money. I started to compare the revenues that I earn with the revenues that I was giving to the company. I thought I can no longer survive... then I left. It was a leap of faith.

When I joined, there I slowly realize that all those things were not really true. Everything slowly emerged. I felt I was trap. I was trying to convince myself that everything was well and good. My proud self was telling me that I made the right decision and I was on the right direction. Then the president will call me and tell me things that an employee wouldn't want to hear. It was so depressing. All the good things that my friend told me was no longer there. "I lost good friends because of you, jay.." phrase was on my mind everyday. I was no longer the positive thinker... I was afraid. Maybe because I am a family man and that matters to me. My family. What will happen to my family if I don't have a job? Panic set in. It was confusing. I felt I was self-destructing... and I never confided to my wife until I decided to make a move. I just didn't want her to think about it and blame me for my miseries.

Exactly a year ago when I decided to make a small step to redeem my lost self. Though it would be another two months of insults, fear, and self-realization... it was a damn small step to redemption.

Until now, I am thanking my wife for standing by me during those agonizing days. I never seen her so supportive of my instincts. Ella was just there for me, no matter what. I'm also thanking Josh for the uplifting smiles.. it was a blast.

Thank you JobsDB for the assistance... you may never know but you helped me made a damn small step...

Cheaper Air Travel

I'll be flying to Malaysia tomorrow and it would be the third time that I take on Air Asia after our company decided to cut down costs. It really make sense though.

Malaysia Airlines could cost you around 30kpesos on a round trip ticket. On the other hand, flying with Air Asia could only cost you around 8kpesos on a round trip ticket.
How was that?

We were interviewing one of the ground staffs of Air Asia at Clark last June about this. She said that Low Cost Carriers like Air Asia will only charge you for the your seat, insurance and fuel surcharges whereas with the Full Service Carriers like PAL, MAS, they charge you with loads of stuffs.

That much? Yes, that much. That includes insurance, fuel surcharge, foods, in-flight entertainment, hotel costs and food costs in case the flight is delayed (wow!), and lots more.
Looks like flying with LCCs makes a lot of sense. Though you have to pay for the food in-flight, you can still save a lot more!

There are some inconveniences though. Delayed flights, horrible shakings in air turbulences, and small legroom.

But the heck, I'm still in one piece!